To KLK ~ From SCBM

We been together almost 2 years. Everything went well until you adjusted yourself to someone else that I don’t know. I hate me for being annoying to get your attention, to get your caring and love. I hate me that I always want to meet you. I hate me that I can’t let you go even tho you ask to leave more than 10 times and I still asking you to stay.

Feeling bottled up?

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2025-08-14

What's wrong with me?

I don't really know what happens. I just feel sorry for everyone and sorry for myself. Every day seems heavy. feel like crying and tiring without doing anything. Feeling lost, no goal. I remember my friends told me to create one if you don't have any dreams. But how if I don't even know what do I love? I'm such an idiot. There's a lot of things running inside my head and I just want anybody to listen without judging me but everyone looks so busy. I'm just a troublemaker. Still, what's happened? what do I actually feel? I hate being like this. I'm lost.

2025-08-14

your presence

it's so weird to no longer have someone in your life. whether it's a friend you don't talk to anymore or a partner you've broken up with, it's so weird to be left with all of this knowledge of someone else and have no use for it anymore. like the way they drink their coffee, their favorite meal when they're sad, a story they told you abt their childhood when you both saw something that reminded them of said story so now you're reminded of it too when you see that thing. and to have someone out in the world with so much intimate and casual knowledge of you and you wonder if they feel happy or sad or uncaring when they see something that reminds them of you too.
2025-08-14

Emji Kay Jr.

A fictional character, who was inspired by a stupid kid with zero commitment. And now, that character is having some mental crisis. The problem is that she’s been doubting her life decisions and kinda want to end every sh*t including her own L… And as a writer, shall I just finish her or let her live fearing those uncertainty?

2025-08-14

To the person that I love the most.!

កន្លងទៅ4​ឆ្នាំ​ហើយ​ ជា​អត្ថបទ​ដែល​ខ្ញុំ​សរសេរទុក​សម្រាប់​បង​: ប្រហែល​នេះ​ជា​statusចុង​ក្រោយ​ដែល​ខ្ញុំ​សរសេរ​សម្រាប់​បង​ ខ្ញុំ​ចង់​និយាយ​ពាក្យ​ខ្លះ​ទៅ​កាន់​មនុស្ស​ម្នាក់​ដែល​ខ្ញុំ​ស្រឡាញ់​ហើយ​ក៏​ស្រលាញ់​ជា​ទី​បំផុត​នៅ​ក្នុង​ជីវិត​ស្នេហា​របស់​ខ្ញុំ​ ថែ​ខ្លួន​ផង​ណា៎​ ញ៉ាំ​អី​អោយ​ទៀងទាត់​ណា​ប្រយ័ត្ន​ឈឺ​ មើល​ទៅ​ដូច​​ជា​រាង​រងារ​ដែរព្រោះ​យប់​នេះ​ព្រោះ​ភ្លៀង​ ​ហើយ​មើល៍​ទៅ​ដូច​ជាមិន​អី​ទេ​បង​រាល់ងៃ​ដូច​រាង​សប្បាយ​ចិត្ត​ដែរ​(ខ្ញុំ​ក៏​រីករាយ​ដែរ​ពេល​បង​បែប​នេះ​)​ ពេល​មាន​ស្នេហា​ កុំ​ភ្លេច​មើល​ថែ​គេ​ ផ្ដល់​ក្តី​ស្រលាញ់​ ភាព​កក់ក្តៅ​ សុភមង្គល​ ពាក្យ​សម្តី​ល្អ​ៗ​ទៅ​កាន់​គេ​ព្រោះ​នេះ​ជា​អ្វី​ដែល​មនុស្ស​គ្រប់​រូប​ចង់​បាន​។​ ហើយ​ជា​ចុងក្រោយ​នៃ​ Status​មួយ​នេះ​ខ្ញុំ​ចង់​ប្រាប់​បង​ថា​ ខ្ញុំ​ស្រឡាញ់​បង​ ខ្ញុំ​នឹក​បង​ ខ្ញុំ​សរសេរ​Status1 នេះ​ទាំង​ទឹក​ភ្នែក​និង​ក្តី​ស្រលាញ់​ដែល​មាន​ចំពោះ​បង​ ខ្ញុំ​មិន​ដឹង​ថា​នឹង​ត្រូវ​បន្ត​បែប​ណា​ឫ​ជា​មួយ​នរណា​ម្នាក់​ក្នុង​ជីវិត​ស្នេហា​1នេះ​ទៀត​ទេ​ ខ្ញុំ​ចងចាំ​សម្លេង​ ការ​ព្រួយបារម្ភ​ ការTake care ពីបង​ ក្តី​ស្រលាញ់​មួយ​នេះ​វា​ធំ​ធេង​ណាស់​សម្រាប់​ខ្ញុំ​ បង​មាន​ដឹង​ទេ? បេះដូង​និង​ចិត្ត​របស់​ខ្ញុំ​ គឺ​ប្រគល់​ឱ្យ​បង​អស់​ហើយ​ ទោះ​បី​យើង​ស្គាល់​គ្នា​ត្រឹម​រយៈ​ពេល​ខ្លី​ក៏​ដោយ​ ខ្ញុំ​ដឹង​ថា​ខ្ញុំ​មិន​ល្អ​គ្រប់​គ្រាន់​សម្រាប់​បង​ទេ​ ទេីប​បង​ចាក​ចេញ​ ដោយ​មុនបាន​និយាយ​អ្វីសោះ​ សុខៗបង​ក៏​ចាក​ចេញ​ដោយ​សារ​ខ្ញុំ​មិន​ស្អាត​ដូច​គេ​ edit(ពេល​នេះ​អ្វី​ៗ​ផ្លាស់ប្ដូរ​ហើយ​ នៅ​ឡើយ​តែ​ចិត្ត​របស់​ខ្ញុំ)​♥️។ #ISTSTYMFPTILTM #Stone
2025-08-14

Being played???

It is probably selfish of me to assume that you were having any feelings on me like I did (kinda still do) for you. With shared interests, I thought that we were vibing just fine. Hell, you even made me feel special. I do not know much about you besides the rare and random interests that we shared, but I truly appreciate the time we spent chatting overnight at when I felt loved during my darkest times. After I learned the news about you going abroad, I felt conflicted. I knew that it was such an opportunity for you, but I also wished that I had spent more time getting to know you better. The thing is that I wanted to express my gratitude and love for you. I just wanted to put it out there. I do not have any intention of wanting to start anything anytime soon, for I do not want to mistake my loneliness and sadness for love. I held my breath for a while. I thought that I genuinely would wait for you. You truly did give me hope, but it seems to be a false hope....I feel gutted. Because after a while, I had my suspicion and learned that the whole time you were with someone else, yet you gave such a sense of love. I feel played for not knowing anything and for being given such false joy. I waited and waited for something that would never come. Maybe it is just a one-sided thing. Maybe I am feeling lonely. Then again, maybe I am just selfish, lonely, and deluded for thinking about any of this because at the end of the day I do not hold anything against you, but I genuinely thank you for all of the times and things that we shared. Lastly, I wish you the best. K

2025-08-14

The saddest thing …

The saddest thing in the world is loving someone who used to love you :)))

2025-08-14

3:23am

Maybe I don’t love them, maybe the feeling of being in relationship is just something that I want to do to fill my void. I go for one after another and it seems like the cycle repeats. They love me, I love them back, I got cheated, I tried to find another one to move on, got heart broken, and move on to another. At this point, I don’t even know if I’m searching for love or just processing the trauma.

2025-08-14

A broken child.

I grew up in a very dysfunctional family. Even though it was very clear at a young age to me that mommy and daddy absolutely hated each other’s guts and only got married in the first place cause of my birth, they refused to divorce. “Staying together for the kids” is the absolute worst thing you can do to a child. Mom and dad, What did I do wrong?? my existence??? [newLine*]Personally, it effected my general self esteem and the way I formed and behaved in relationships for the rest of my life. I was diagnosed with PTSD, (yess PTSD) as growing up in a house that was literally a battlefield. I always blaming myself for being existing. I thought my family was normal. It wasn’t until i turned 15 when I had friends whom I would go visit and then I started seeing something completely different. My friends had normal parents. Before that, I thought a dysfunctional family was normal. I still suffer from anxiety to this day and self-esteem. My problems are a constant fear of getting too close to people, including friends. As I grew older I became more quiet. It’s effected my relationships and friendships to a point where I end up pushing people away. I like being alone where there’s complete silence and nothing can bother me. I think I came to this point due to growing up in my parents house and constantly hearing them scream at each other, doors slamming. My self-esteem problems are mostly from being ignored and neglected through out my early life. My parents whose were never involved with anything of my childhood despite us living in the same household. The cause of their arguments has always been about me, and still is to this day. My dad came home from work and fighting with my mom because of me, it became worse with age. I feel embarrassed or ashamed to even talk about this with my close friends. My family was of the type that everything happened behind closed doors and out in public. If I had friends come over, they became entirely different people in front of my friends. They could actually act right and tolerate each other when they had company- (why the hell can’t you be normal like that all the time?) For this reason, I never opened up and told my friends what happened in our house cause I feared they’d never believe me. It wasn’t until my early adult years, I finally opened up and started telling my friends what really going on at home but some of them told me that no matter what it is, they’re still my parents and they loves me but they don't seem to loves me nor even care about my feelings except for their own. I always want to get away from them and living my life without them. Sometimes when I opened up about it not because I want empathy nor attention but I just need someone who listen to me, listen to me without judging me. Don’t get me wrong I do appreciate my friends and understand that they’re just trying their best to comfort me.