Bullied? Anxiety? - T

I used to be considered as “ugly” (got bullied for being overweight, etc. even adults used to do that to me :D ) that really destroyed my self esteem. Although, I lost weight and take care of myself and is considered as pretty now but still the permanent mental damages are there. I had developed eating disorder, social anxiety, etc. I fake being confident but the anxiety, the trembling, and panic attack always happened. And because of that anxiety that fear of being judged I think a huge misunderstanding was made. Sometimes I really wish I could just communicate better instead of always being quiet. :)

Feeling bottled up?

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2025-08-14

Our story

Even the title is “ Our Story “ but you have no idea about it. I wrote it my own , you are the main lead who, the main actress which is me fell in love with every piece of mine whereas you don’t know you are the main lead who the main actress adore so much. No matter how cold or heartless you’ve been to her. You mean a lot to her and for you , we just mean to meet. I was a barely page in your book but you filled every space in mine. This is the end of the story that never start but here I am still admiring you from far apart.

2025-08-14

What is this feeling

Can anyone tell me what is this feeling It been a long time since they broke the bond. We try to understand them and wish them all the best. However, seeing them with someone new, doing all the things that we should do together some how hurt. It like trauma, it hit right there in the heart, it got you tremble, feeling lost, all the hope we try to hold on are gone, almost down on the knee. I swear there is no hatred, there is no evil though to break them apart. It just feel like can’t stand seeing it, can’t accept it, bare to see it but Why it is someone else in that place? How could? Did we really do sth wrong? Were we never good enough for them? How could they just switch to do all the things with someone else while our heart still beat for them? Why do they treat us this way while our intention is only love and to be with them?

2025-08-14

Why Is Dating So Hard For Women Today?

It can sometimes feel as though things were easier back in the day. No mobile phones. No social media. And no bulls**t. If you liked someone, you told them.If a man wanted to take a woman out, he’d ask her face to face or call her on the phone (so old school). No sliding into people’s DMs and saying, “low key feeling you.” Fast forward to today, and dating has gotten confusing for us all. The mixed signals, the misinterpretations, and the total lack of clear communication. Does he like me? Is he just being nice? Does he just want to f*ck around? Why does he think it’s okay to treat me like an option? Why can’t I find a kind, honest, sweetheart of a man and live happily ever after?

2025-08-14

A piece of you

I'm scared because if no one makes me feel the way you did. but I'll be ok for a few days but then it hits me, I stop functioning and everything falls apart again. What hurts is that we never really said goodbye. We just kind of ended. And I'm afraid I'll miss you forever. But then again, you didn't say goodbye, and a part of me believes that means you're coming back.

2025-08-14

Friendship

Hi, actually I don’t know where to start it such a long story and complex mind to describe it out. I confess here today just want to seek for the answer : “ AM I ACTUALLY A FAKE FRIEND HERE “ I’m a girl who has a circle of friends, but only 2 I count as the dearest to me since I can trust them. But there’s also another one friend who I luv as well it just that we had so many things that’s not compatible with each other and I don’t share her my secret. Let’s called her Angel. Even though I never tell her my secret but I swear I never want to hurt or dislike her in anyway. But the thing is that she counts me as her closest friend, she told me. But I don’t quite understand her and I feel bad for that as well. Why I don’t trust her?! Actually we know each other 14yrs already. She’s that type of person who talked about how she feel mad and upset about a person and within a minute she see them she smile and wave Hi as nothing happened. And yes, as the listener I feel guilt. And that’s one of the things I’m scare to trust her. Btw Angel is also such a sweet person tho, she always made gift to our classmates. But the things is she’s an over thinker and always upset. She upset because I hang out with one of my friends without her. But actually she always hang out with her friends as well and I never say anything. She’s also that type of person who would say “ I’m not a talker, I’m a thinker” but every time she always share about sad stuff and friends things with such a caption that made me think she talked about me or other friends by writing the caption with “ They this They that” ( I don’t just pick the shoes and wear it as Cinderella here don’t get me wrong she just throw it towards me) I myself never like to put myself in such a complicating situation. But she just share another post with the caption as if she always happy for me and I never happy for her. As if I’m a fake friend here. And I cmt on her post like the response is just as “ I know u talked abt me “ and u guess what after the beef at the cmt she text me and ask me to hang out with her like nothing happened. That’s all, actually I feel like I’m also in the wrong here myself. It would be such a pleasure if u guy can give me some advice

2025-08-14

My Fault

-N💗 Im sorry for hurting you. It was childish of me to do that to you. I don’t expect u to forgive me. I wish I could take every ounce of pain u feel right now. I love you, always. #221020

2025-08-14

In between

I could say I moved on, that’s why I’m here with my new relationship for 3 months. Last month was when my ex of 2 years has asked me if there’s a chance for us to be back tgt again. I told him and made things pretty clear with him that there’s no chance of us doing so, because I’m in a healthy relationship with my new bf. As I’m writing him to explain my feelings, I realized I’m not fully healed, it’s still hurting recalling the memory’s of us as I explaining, I still have a soft spot for him, he’s still a part of me. To ask whether I hate my ex after we broken up? I would say I don’t hate him not even one bit, I was just solely disappointed in him. Relationship with him was healthy, understanding, supportive, faithful and all, until earlier last year, when he made me thinks that the bare minimum was too much request in relationship. A part of the problem came from the environment that we’re surrounded with, everything’s started to change so did he, he became very arrogant, he used to be so supportive now every opinion of mine become invalid and he always listen to others before me. That’s when I feel miserable everyday being with him, things going on for months to the point I feel like I should leave and I did. He didn’t beg or anything he let me go and that’s when I also realized he may has lost his feeling for me and that I should work on myself. It’s been almost a year, I met someone new. To compare everything to him, my new bf is more like my dream ideal type, he asked to be his gf (possibly potential partner for the future, because we planned on our future and everything tgt, tho the duration seems pretty short) and I should say him and I get along just fine. It’s just this one thing, the amount of effort he put is way less than my ex when we’re in love. To put things in short, I don’t want to admit it but I must say that I’m almost like a chaser in this relationship even though he’s the one that asked me first. At some point, I also feel tired too, I wasn’t like this in my previous relationship, before everything changes, I was treated almost like a queen, never a day I ever feel like unwanted or lefted alone ever. That’s what I love the most out of previous relationships. As being with the new one, I feel like the Karmas do me good, now that everything my ex did for me, I’m doing it to my new bf without a return. I sometimes miss being treated by my ex, now that he came back and he changed a lot because of all the flaws that I explained to him before I ended the relationship making me miss him even more. Back to the question if I should go back to my previous relationship or should I moved on, I’m in a serious debate. My ex and I shared deeper connection than my new one, but I don’t want to give up on my new relationship just yet just because of my ex return, plus my new relationship is a long distance one, it’s unfair for him to compare things that my ex can possibly do just because he’s near me and was spending much longer time than my new one. I can’t just compare things. As for now I really don’t know what to do (I really need an anonymous consultation if anyone interested to help pls cmt, I’ll reach u out in anonymous acc)

2025-08-14

A day my heart torn into pieces.

Your last text! Hi I have something to say.... I want to make something clear about something that I assume we both know.... i saw your video and i am pretty sure that I am the one who cause you to become like this... i am so sorry if the action that i express may lead to your wrong interpretation, that on my side. I want to make things clear as soon as I realize you don't think me just a friend, however it might ruin our friendship which i am not looking forward to.... you are a great person you deserve someone that truly for you, you don't need to wish that you were others.. you are great the way you are. You might not meet the one yet. But for a person like you, you deserve this whole world and someone that you truly deserve. I felt really guilty to be honest that we came to this point that you are suffering, effecting you mentally which I have never intended to..., i should have told you earlier than this... sorry but we could be no more than friends. If you don't mind I would be prefer if we remain just like before. I can not stand to see someone suffering because of me. this might hurt now but hopes it fade away as time goes by. Hope you understand and i hope i made things clear for both of our sides. Thank you for being the best supporter, helper, friends and adviser.