(This is like a note to myself) There’s a quote said don’t expect the happiness from where u lost it and they’re right. No matter how much u still love someone or feel like u want to give someone another chance just because u feel bad about it, just don’t do it. It’s not worth it. If there’s moment when u feel like u should go back, just remember how much u have strived, how much u have tried to moved on from all the trauma, how hard u have tried just to get urself back up again. I have come so far just to get over all the trauma that he gave me, now that I gave him a chance, he flipped on me and now I have to go through the same process all over again. It’s hurting and it’s embarrassing at the same time. He making me feel like a clown, but thanks for the lesson.
You’re the only one that can make me smile through my hard time, make my gloomy day like the most beautiful day, and the only person that I wanna share everything with. But… you don’t feel the same as me, you’re waiting for someone else's message, you’re still sad over her even though you know that she has a boyfriend. Well, I’m still watching you, worrying about you secretly, and still waiting for your text;)) From stupid me C
Memories seemed to be faded as the time flew without stopping a single second, out of the blue, we started to chat with each other again. it'd been many year since we last talked to each other. first of all, I just want to know if you are fine, healthy, and happy with your boyfriend even though I feel that you guys have already broken up. As before you're still the most hardworking girl ( i should say woman yet I still find you still a girl who didn't know your own limit). my feeling for you is still over here even though we have already broken up for many years, I wonder and always ask myself are you still have feelings for me as before? but my feeling told me that you had already moved on and prepared to be successes woman who didn't depend on others. Everything has changed yet my feeling still stay. I'm standing from here wishing you success on your journey and being able to find your true happiest with the right partner who stays there with you through every situation. ^_^
1. Your body is more than just what it looks like. Your body has kept you alive through a pandemic - how amazing is that? It works so hard everyday. Your body enables you to run, to do daily activities, to study and work and do the things you love. So remember to love and take care of it, and nourish your body and soul. Don’t punish it. Remember to eat, because food is fuel. There’s no bad food or good food. 2. Your clothes fit you, not “you have to fit into your clothes”. It’s okay to gain or lose weight, to go up or down clothing sizes. You probably don’t look like your high school self anymore because you’re not supposed to. Remember that some of us are growing boys and girls, and our bodies will change, and that’s totally fine ❤️ Remember to embrace it :) 3. There is no “perfect” body (long legs, flat stomach). Everyone’s body is different. You might see pictures of models online looking all slim and fit, their bellies flat. But no one looks like that *all the time* in real life. Poses, tensing, edits - you see the highlights, what they want you to see. You can unfollow accounts that make you feel bad. It’s okay to have fat, to have fat on your belly; it’s a food pouch that holds happiness!! Your perfect body is whatever you want it to be, as long as you’re happy and healthy and comfortable. You’re beautiful and anyone who tells you otherwise can shove a porcupine up their ass yeehaw. 4. You can love yourself just as you are now. You don’t have to wait until you’re prettier or thinner or more successful, more worthy to start loving yourself. You are worthy of love, right now just as you are. 5. If you don’t think you look good in pictures, maybe it’s because you have the kind of beauty that moves :) - a reddit comment I saw years ago I’ve struggled with body image issues for a few years now, and these are things I have to keep telling myself. I believe them some days less than other days, and my relationship with food and my body still isn’t the best. But that’s okay. Self-love is a journey. I hope these little reminders can help anyone out there struggling with their body too ❤️
I'm sorry that you have to deal with my bullshit. I didn't realize I have a lot of bullshit. I'm not that type of person, I swear. You raised your voice saying “ I'm dealing with your bullshit everyday, dealing with your bullshit is tiring. I thought you were not that type of person.”. I'm sorry, I was just telling you how my day was like how you always tell me about yours. I didn't mean to rant on you or maybe I sounded like one and if so, I thought you would listen to me and comfort me like other couples do but it's okay as long as you still love me, I don't mind. I was blinded by the illusion of you that I created in my mind.
How could I start it? I'm more than confused by you and felt disrespect. I've never thought your notification would matter to me. I genuinely never believe that one notification would make someone's day. But here I am waiting for your notification. For all these past years, I have never tried to open up or try to make it work as I did with you. I used to give zero effort to the guys that were trying to get close to me. For you, I check you out, I make sure to keep the conversation going. I thought maybe we could go far than this. Sometimes, I thought of how you would feel to me. Maybe, he is shy? He is not sure yet? Maybe, I don't open myself enough? or did I do something that he would feel confused. I doubted myself as well. However, your behavior ends up showing how you truly feel to me. Rather than trying to approach me back, you act as we've never had something between us. It's more than enough that a girl could approach a guy first and talk. Man up! Man up for the next girl you playing.
If you ask me, it breaks me in million of pieces trying to say " No, it's the end between us." I badly wish you were the right one, who came in the right time. But being in a relationship with you really make doubt if it was not a mistake. It's silly, but it has be admitted that loving you each and every cost the loss of myself. I have felt the loss and miserable self for a long time ago before I finally asked for closure. Tbh, loving didn't make me feel exited to discuss about our future at all. Instead, I spent most of the time trying to figure how to detach myself from you. I questioned how can I unlove you. The only thing I felt was falling for you too deep that I still wanted your love while knowing I was being ignored and mistreated for many times. I was trying my best to fight with my heart, and let the love go. I did give you chances, too. But you ruined them yourself. You came and ask for the last one??? No, darling. NOT AGAIN. You know when you go against your conscientiousness, ego, pride to admit that you should have said "I will try to change for you." on the night be broke up, I went through sadness again. Why? I have to keep my answer unchanged even though I badly want to be in love with you. I was afraid to love you again, to lose myself again, to know that hurt me again, and still love you. I was so scared. What if I started to never recognise my worth, and blindly love you again? What if it happened again? I don't know if I could save myself one more time if I let you in my life for the last time. I wish you know how to love me. Just a little bit more. That could have been enough for us... I'm sorry! But you're late to do so.
It is probably selfish of me to assume that you were having any feelings on me like I did (kinda still do) for you. With shared interests, I thought that we were vibing just fine. Hell, you even made me feel special. I do not know much about you besides the rare and random interests that we shared, but I truly appreciate the time we spent chatting overnight at when I felt loved during my darkest times. After I learned the news about you going abroad, I felt conflicted. I knew that it was such an opportunity for you, but I also wished that I had spent more time getting to know you better. The thing is that I wanted to express my gratitude and love for you. I just wanted to put it out there. I do not have any intention of wanting to start anything anytime soon, for I do not want to mistake my loneliness and sadness for love. I held my breath for a while. I thought that I genuinely would wait for you. You truly did give me hope, but it seems to be a false hope....I feel gutted. Because after a while, I had my suspicion and learned that the whole time you were with someone else, yet you gave such a sense of love. I feel played for not knowing anything and for being given such false joy. I waited and waited for something that would never come. Maybe it is just a one-sided thing. Maybe I am feeling lonely. Then again, maybe I am just selfish, lonely, and deluded for thinking about any of this because at the end of the day I do not hold anything against you, but I genuinely thank you for all of the times and things that we shared. Lastly, I wish you the best. K
I wonder how does it feel like to be loved and spoiled by someone? I wonder how does it feel like to have someone care and protect u at all cost? I wonder how does it feel like when someone say “ you are the world to me “ “ you are the reason I smile” I wonder how does it it feel like to know that after a long tiring day you actually have someone you can whines to? BUT I really can’t imagine someone actually love me . I can’t imagine someone having a crush on me. I can’t imagine someone thinking about me before they waking up or fall asleep.I can’t imagine someone getting butterflies in his stomach when I talk to or smile at him.I can’t imagine my presence make someone day brighter or happier. I can’t imagine someone smiling at their phone or get excited when we are talking . I can’t imagine someone want to see me everyday especially when their bad day. Cus this is ME. Why would they do that to or with me? I’m just ME. BUT IF I ever find someone someday. I can’t wait to spoil him too. I can’t wait to spend all the loves I have been saved for many years. I can’t wait to tell him how thankful I am for him. Maybe someday , Someday I can understand THESE kind of feeling too