We started to know each other at the University by our mutual friends a year after enrolling the University. Our class were next door and we were complete stranger. We completely came from different world. Her friends got a project. I was asked to help. We became friend at first but not really closed one. Months later, I started to care, to curious, to chase, and to chat to her. I didn't know that it was a beginning of catching feelings for someone since I have never had one. I was pretty annoying her by some of my actions because I didn't know how I should do to express my feelings. I was unreasonably angry at her when she ignored me like I was invisible. Unfortunately, I changed class to another shift. We separated. I did miss her. Whenever, she asked me for help. I never said "NO" because I made me happy for helping her. I thought alone that she would have feelings for me, too. And yeah, it was one-sided love from me. She was already in relationship with someone whom I knew at that time. My heart broke into pieces. I cried without being aware of it was a heart broken feelings. I pretended to congrats her and be laughing in front of her. Years passed by, we didn't contact. She only chatted to me once she needed helps. Still, I didn't reject any requests. She sent me some songs, yet I didn't realize what the meaning of sending a song. I asked her why she sent me songs. She said "nothing" just send to me and listen. I was so dumb or I thought that she was in relationship. I shouldn't care about her anymore. She may be breaking up with someone I know. And, getting into another relationship. I also realized that. I always kept my distance just don't want to hurt myself more than before. She did reply to my story sometimes. I didn't reply much as before. Yeah, my feelings for her still remains the same until now and it's been 4 years. I met new people. Those closed friends told me that I should move on and opens for new one because she didn't have any feelings for me as they can assume of my storytelling. We both don't cut each other off. We are still contacting. We sometimes talk deeper, flirting, and argue. However, I don't really want to express my feeling because I don't know whether she is available. Whatever, I still care, love, stand behind her, buy her food. I do everything I could do for her in the name of her friend. You will always be in my heart, my friend. 👩❤️👩
In case someone said I'm trying to ruin other family, I have to say it first. I never had any intention to ruin his marriage just because some memories. He and his wife deserve to be happy and live their life. I'm just a part of his past. I'm also a woman and I won't do anything that could hurt another woman. Please don't take my confession to the wrong way!!!
We werent supposed to meet. I was supposed to walk a path set out for me...i was supposed to never step a foot or breathe into your world...but a moment of recklessness brought me into a new world that made me into a happier person. And I met you. You were always like a shadow until one day i stopped, turned around, and fell immediately into your cold, indifferent eyes. You barely talked to anybody, but you were responsive to me. You tolerated my meanness, you listened to my sob stories, and you let me talked abt my drama without making me feel like i am a bother. Slowly, you opened up to me...but I know there is still a deeper part of you I might never get to know. Nevertheless, as friends, you are the best friend a girl could ever asked for. I've never had a male friend, so thank you for making me feel appreciated. Thank you for making me feel safe. Most important of all, thank you for making me realize what it feels like to fall in love with a true gentleman. I know my feelings arent mutual, but that is fine. We are still young. Our dreams are still far. One day, I will look back at us and smile. One day, when I am ready to move on, I will picture you in my head and tell myself, "This is the standard you're aiming for. Do not settle for less." Please...please dont get tired of me. I scolded you, nagged you because i care. I know you have the potential to be a succesful man that is why I do not want you to waste your potential. I want your family and the girl whom you will end up with to be proud of you. Why? Because you deserve the world. I care about you. A lot. I always do and I always will.
我有一头牛
There have been countless times where I've made you feel all of those disgusting feelings knowing full well how much you loved me knowing how much I hated these but I couldn't bring myself to change so suddenly. So i gave up our connection even though I still loved you dearly. Maybe that's why it pained me to see you being all hurtful and anxious because of my thoughtless actions, the thought that only me matters in our relationship. I've pictured us in a family of many pets, pictured you being the best dad and the best husband a man could ever be. That at some point i was unable to picture my life without you. But gradually, I've realized my behaviors started to hurt you, my actions began to make you doubt my love for you, we kept misinterpreting and misunderstanding each other. I tried my best to be optimistic about the situation despite being the over emotional and dramatic person i am. I have thought that with love, we could overcome everything but i was naive. I forgot that love is just the topping to the already flourishing relationship. We couldn't take each other's words to heart, you have a complete different opinion and view and so do I. So how can we expect each of us to understand each other? I've resisted the urge to approach you multiple times already since we broke up, I've cried thinking about you, i just wanted to scream loudly so the whole world know i miss you. I've missed you but I'd rather pick your happiness over this. I'll still hold the belief that you'll find someone who can shoulder all the burdens you're carrying, always be the ear to listen to your thoughts, always have the heart to open to your everything. I'll pray for you. I didn't want to make this long, but it's already long. So I wanna close this with .... I love you. Sorry that your last person couldn't be me. I will forever cherish the memories we had. Please stay safe and healthy. From that girl who let you go away.
My story is similar to your chapter 20. I have a friend and we both are girls. We kinda keep our lives low-key so no one really knows what’s going on in our lives (personal problems and stuff) except that we told each other our stories. It all began when my life had fallen in the darkness where I pushed everyone away and I didn’t even talk to anyone but not until she was there for me. She gave me the kind of feelings that I’d never had before. Not once in my life had felt like that with anyone although I have many friends. She told me that she would look at her phone for 24hours just to waiting for me to reply her texts. But then things started to falling apart. We would just stop talking for no reason. Instead of talking to each other, we just assumed if the other one was okay or not. It’s really toxic I know even we tried to talk about it, it was still getting worse. I kept wondering “is she okay?” “what if she tries to do something bad?”. I would stalk all her social media accounts and then I noticed her bio. So if we wanted to say something during the time that we ignored each other, we would change our bio. After months and months, I realised that I actually got attached to her. I needed her validation. Unlike anyone else, she made me feel so special. But the thing is I don’t understand this feeling. I wasn’t sure if she would feel the same way. I thought it’s just impossible cause we’re best friends and I didn’t wanna ruin this great friendship that I have ever had in my entire life. The connection was just different from others. The connection wouldn’t last so long. I still feel the same but I don’t know about hers. We’re like strangers with many unforgettable memories now. However, thanks to her for being a huge part of my life. Thank you.
I caught myself being loyal to a man who ain’t even my boyfriend.🙂
We knew each other since 2017. We both living in separate way but we know each other well. But in 2021 we talk a lot more than unusual. We about about our day our person we like then until we both feeling something to each other. I don’t think I should confess her.
If you ask me, it breaks me in million of pieces trying to say " No, it's the end between us." I badly wish you were the right one, who came in the right time. But being in a relationship with you really make doubt if it was not a mistake. It's silly, but it has be admitted that loving you each and every cost the loss of myself. I have felt the loss and miserable self for a long time ago before I finally asked for closure. Tbh, loving didn't make me feel exited to discuss about our future at all. Instead, I spent most of the time trying to figure how to detach myself from you. I questioned how can I unlove you. The only thing I felt was falling for you too deep that I still wanted your love while knowing I was being ignored and mistreated for many times. I was trying my best to fight with my heart, and let the love go. I did give you chances, too. But you ruined them yourself. You came and ask for the last one??? No, darling. NOT AGAIN. You know when you go against your conscientiousness, ego, pride to admit that you should have said "I will try to change for you." on the night be broke up, I went through sadness again. Why? I have to keep my answer unchanged even though I badly want to be in love with you. I was afraid to love you again, to lose myself again, to know that hurt me again, and still love you. I was so scared. What if I started to never recognise my worth, and blindly love you again? What if it happened again? I don't know if I could save myself one more time if I let you in my life for the last time. I wish you know how to love me. Just a little bit more. That could have been enough for us... I'm sorry! But you're late to do so.