Can anyone give this a title?
Where to begin? Because I don’t know exactly what I’m feeling right now. There’s a person whom I used to have a crush on him while I was in grade 10. FYI, I’m a senior student at a university now. We are friends from high school to university. Literally, everywhere I turn to for the last 6 to 7 years, he’s always there. At some point, while I was having a crush on him, I found out he liked someone already. So, as I should, I moved on. I found myself a boyfriend and just live my life. We’re still friends and eventually, we grew closer as years passed. As nice as he always is, he helps me, listens to me venting my anger, or just listens to me complaining about my life. The problem is that I didn’t realize that I’ve been depending on him too much for the last few years. Only until recently, when he couldn’t be there to help me anymore that I realized I did always stand alone. More or less, he’s always there to help. Lately, he hasn't been around much. You know, as we grow old, we get more responsibility and life is just busier. For some reason, I feel like I’m breaking up with someone I’ve never been with in the first place. FYI, he’s just nice. He’s like that to everyone and I’ve never thought that I’m special to him either. Anyway, what is this feeling called?