Should’ve known earlier
I thought I was special. Maybe not to anyone but to you in specifically and yet she was the one that you always have and going to choose. I have nothing to complain tho but it still strings me ‘til these days.
But what if I fail? what if fail?what should I do? What am I going to do next? What's their first impression when they know that I fail?what if they hate they? disgusted me? disappointed in me? scold me? look down on me? what's going to happens? should I just kill myself right away?I don't know I just knew that if I am really fail, the next thing is I'm not in my right mind,my mental health is unstable,all I can think is die cause im scared to tell them,I don't think I have any courage to tell them,I don't think I am brave enough to see their reaction after I tell them that I fail.. If I actually going to fail ,all I want is someone I trust to be by my side,I don't need their comfort words,all I want is someone to sit by my side and stop me from killing myself cause I can't trust myself..I just can't. But I don't have anyone.None. all my favorite people are gone. They're too far away. #BacII14/11/22
I thought I was special. Maybe not to anyone but to you in specifically and yet she was the one that you always have and going to choose. I have nothing to complain tho but it still strings me ‘til these days.
When he likes u but not the like enough to make u his gf 🥴
To "you", I still remember our first encounter very well. It was a few years ago, it was when I was about to go home but I saw you were struggling with getting your bike out. We were total stranger to one another (even for now). So, I decided to help you. It was a little bit windy day, and as I was helping you, because of a light blow of the wind, flipped up your skirt a little bit. I thought maybe it was uncomfortable for you because of the wind, so I offered my jacket for you to cover yourself, but lucky, you got a motorbike tower of your own. (Sorry for too detail) After I got bike out, we exchange a normal pleasantry, "Thank you very much","you're welcome" and we part way. I only happened to know that you and I were in the class after the incident day. However, back then, I was in my rough patch, and it was so rough that I decided to drop the course. However, Within those few years, you always cross my mind, and I kind of have a fondness for you as well, even though we never got a chance to know each other. I really do wish and hope that we will have our paths cross once again, then we can get to know each other, and somehow, I hope we can work it out, and we end up being together. I really think that you are a very sweet and nice person, I really really like to know you. As if you were book that I would spend the rest of my time to read. (Even I'm not quite a reader) Hope you see this, and hope you remember me as I remember you. From a stranger.
I used to be considered as “ugly” (got bullied for being overweight, etc. even adults used to do that to me :D ) that really destroyed my self esteem. Although, I lost weight and take care of myself and is considered as pretty now but still the permanent mental damages are there. I had developed eating disorder, social anxiety, etc. I fake being confident but the anxiety, the trembling, and panic attack always happened. And because of that anxiety that fear of being judged I think a huge misunderstanding was made. Sometimes I really wish I could just communicate better instead of always being quiet. :)
We used to know each other when we were young, but we didn’t talk much. As we grew older we’ve met again. This time it was different, we were so connected, understanding each other, having same opinion m, having same interest and having the same groups of friends. I wasn’t ready to start the relationship with him like the way he was, I was hesitate because I was scared that “ what if one day we broke up”. “ what if we were to broke up and things got awkward between us”. “ what if we had to go through pain”. These thought keeps me thinking every single day until one day he stopped. Everything ends because he had his own personal reason, he has choices to choose. That’s is when I realize I wasn’t the only one for him. Without doubt he choose someone else and this still makes me think how much I thought about “ us”. This is my story. If knongjit decide to post it please correct my writing because it is not that good and thank you I really can express my feeling without no one knowing who I am.
The heart beat i felt in my dream last night it feel so real. Like it was too good to be true. I know i ain't gonna experience it with u irl. But at least if the multiverse actually exist i know one of my alternate self is having good time with u.
Hey there, Just wanna leave a message here. Well, it’s something that is bittersweet. You’re a beautiful flower and I love to see you grow. Azami,
What would you do if you found out you're just an alternative or a shadow to his ex? Do you feel hurt? Angry? Hatred? Because I do. It was not wrong to not love somebody. What's wrong is how you keep telling me how much you love me, then keep going back to your ex. What's wrong is how you told me to forget the past and start it all again, then betray me and do all those things again the next day. What's wrong is how you told me to put my heart into trusting you, but you're using my trust against me. You kept saying you love me, but that's not love. There's no way you can love me when you still keep everything from your past. There's no way you can love me when you can fall in love with another girl within a week. There's no way you can love me when you regret being with me and hope you have chosen her instead. The funny thing is, people hurt me, but I'm now the bad guy. I hope all those people who did me wrong, who invalidate my feeling, who blame me for reacting the way I did, will all get their karma very soon. I have all this rage in me because I'm the one that has been suffering. To the people that said that it was normal and I was the one that overreacting, I hope you will be treated like this for the rest of your life. I was never someone who hold a grudge and be so revengeful, anyone who knows me knows how I always forgive people, but not this time. I choose to heal in hell.