My precious Doggos

When I was younger, I had three dogs: two males: Jia and Zong and one female: Lin. Anyways, Jia always acted dominantly, and for years he would regularly beat up Zong to prove his dominance and superiority. Zong finally attacked Jia one day. His entire chest was torn up he barely survived surgery. A week later, his kidneys failed and he died. My dad was going to put him down, but he ended up giving him away instead. I never saw him again. I helped bury Jia, and while he was laying in a blanket as we dug Lin came and sat by his body. Two weeks later I woke to find her dead in her dog house, she had no visible signs of injury and had been healthy. She was buried by morning. It might not compare to other people's stories, "they're only dogs anyways", but it was really hard losing all three of my childhood dogs, friends I'd known my entire life, within a few weeks. I haven't cried ever since I buried Lin.

Feeling bottled up?

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Crush on someone you can't fall in love

Dear Admin! Yes, I'm talking to you. I am not sure if you know me, but we know each other for a while, and I used to have a crush on you; and yet it's impossible. At that time, we are completely different, far from each other, we didn't talk much, but I noticed you every time. You were hardworking, full of commitment, and you are pretty. Your smile bright my day, your eyes sparkle like the stars, you are so good. And I could feel that you also had the same feeling about me. However, this relationship cannot happen because I have a girlfriend and I know it's wrong to have this kind of feeling, but it's temporary, and now I can get myself together, and stop thinking about it. No matter what, I hope to see your smile every day, hear your voice every day, look into your bright eyes every morning. It makes me feel so happy. I hope we see each other again soon, not as lovers, but as 2 aquaintances who has the same feeling to each other.

Wishes

The tough days I went through by myself, the darkness nights I cried without anyone knowing, the unexplainable thoughts I unable to solve, the overthinking idiot and the mentally tiring soul, I don’t freaking know how long I can deal with it anymore. I wish I could give myself the loves and comfort the way I always have for others. I wish I could put myself as my first priority AT LEAST FOR ONCE, but the freaking soft me can never do that. I wish I could speak my mind and express how I feel inside but the thought of people will leave me is frightening me. Sometimes all I need is comfort, but how can I expect people to comfort me when I can’t even do it to myself? I wish I could control the emotion I have against myself, but nahhh the stupid me don’t know how to do that. Maybe I’m the problematic one…

Our story

Even the title is “ Our Story “ but you have no idea about it. I wrote it my own , you are the main lead who, the main actress which is me fell in love with every piece of mine whereas you don’t know you are the main lead who the main actress adore so much. No matter how cold or heartless you’ve been to her. You mean a lot to her and for you , we just mean to meet. I was a barely page in your book but you filled every space in mine. This is the end of the story that never start but here I am still admiring you from far apart.

Being with ppl pleaser is tiring

We broken up alr but we promised to still support one another when in need (mentally and physically). When I was down and feel like I need support from u the most, u never there. I’m trying to contact u, ur phone is always busy, I message u, u don’t reply, I’m desperately waiting u at school, u’re sneakingly left without me knowing and go for drinking with ur “team”. Bold of me to assumed that u changed. One of the big reason why I decided to walk away is b’cuz it’s consuming so much of my energy. I’m tired of being left alone, I’m tired of being ur second choice, I’m tired of one side communication, I’m tired of not being heard and understood, I’m tired of not feeling validated. I never feel loved, I feel miserable being with u. Whenever I feel like I’m in confusion with my feelings whether my decision was right or wrong, u always prove me that I should never go back to u, because u always make me feel like shit. It’s torturing being like this. I don’t hate u and I don’t think I will, but u always disappoint me in every way possible.

A stranger that I want to meet

I met this stranger at Major Cineplex Aeon 2 today (21.Nov). We were sitting next to each other while watching the Eternals (schedule 2:00pm). I really want to be friend with him but I could not gather up my courage to approach him. So I hope this post will reach him. And to you, if you see this please interact with this post. I really hope I can find you and I hope we can be friend. 💫

Til The Day We Close The Gap Between Us (Long Distance Friendship)

We all wished to have been born in another country than the one we have gotten. Regretfully we cannot control our fate. However, we are individuals with free will, and it is up to us to do whatever it takes to rightfully get to a country that we wish to have been born in. Here is my story: I felt the love for another person’s country and the warmth embrace of two lovely girls all the way in Northern Europe from my cozy and comfortable room in Cambodia. I met them through a mutual friend/family of mine in the summer of 2021, whom agreed to connect me with my soon-to be friends virtually to discuss on studying abroad. Right from that moment that we were connected, I felt that I was supposed to meet you. The memories and feelings that blossomed as we talked and called on our phones about 9,000 km apart still makes my heart smile as I am writing this confession now. The laughters and jokes that we shared those late nights still makes my heart palpitated just by thought of it. From the moment I expressed my love and appreciation for your country, the interest in pursuing a graduate level study in your country, and the admiration for the language of your people, you have been nothing but supportive, warmth and friendly in the cause for my struggle. You have brought peace and calmness throughout this long journey of mine. Most importantly, for every time that we talked you expects to see and awaits my arrival. For that I am 🥹 grateful, I cannot wait to close the gaps between us.

Am I falling in love with him ?

I've first known him when we were studying French in the same class, we're also studying at the same university and we haven't contacted or talked to each other. One day while the teacher called him and he didn't reply , that's the reason that I chatted to him by Telegram to inform him that " Madame call u xd , why didn't u reply ? ". After that , we were in touch with each other ask and chatted to each other, I also ask for his FB account. Moreover, I also chatted with him by Messenger and talked to each other for several topics but not so frequency or everytime. I've known that he's a quiet person because of his character and his FB account and I really knew that kind of this person! We always share something to each other and ask about each other's daily life. In addition, we absolutely would like to share some informations of scholarships, subjects or exercises. I think I was so surprised because we want to take the same major and have the same plan ! But I haven't known myself that when I chatted with him , I am so warmly heart and feel so good even if he chatted to me not the long text ! At first I didn't know about this feeling because I've just known him as classmate and schoolmate and we haven't met each other before by this pandemic situation ( school was closed since the first day of started day of school ). Finally, I've just realized that I have a mood on him ( crush on him ) but I haven't shown this to him because I think I could lose this friendship ):

Irreplaceable you.

You were the best, you were the one who i trully “Love”. The word ‘Love’ is a strong word for both of us to use. We cross path as if fate brought us together for a reason. We clicked so well, it feels like 2 broken pieces were placed to complete each other missing parts. We both have the same taste in Movies, Music, things that revolve around us, We like to spend quality time together. It gets to the point where the word ‘Love’ grows on me and It gets to the point where i can’t go on a day without talking to you. You are just as cold as the winter, independent as you are and i love you. It’s hard for you to show your feelings toward others, you said it’s lame to ask for affections. but we eventually part ways. Months have passed, I started to live without you, I couldn’t move on from you if gets to the point where i have to date someone to move on from you, for godsake i couldn’t you were there everywhere i go, on my mind like a lyric that stucked in my head and i kept repeating it over and over. Everywhere i go i see familiar faces, where they looked like you, same glasses, same length of hair, the same hair style, the same way u walk, everything just reminding me of you. I was a fool to let you go, everything leads to regret, i should have never left you in the first place, i should have changed for you. You loved me, you moved on. I’m happy for you. We both crossed path and i’m glad. Our time that we’ve spent it will shine like gold in my memories. Irreplaceable you, no one can take your place.