β’Having a Handsome Crush is fine, not Until you Discover that He's gayππ
A fictional character, who was inspired by a stupid kid with zero commitment. And now, that character is having some mental crisis. The problem is that sheβs been doubting her life decisions and kinda want to end every sh*t including her own Lβ¦ And as a writer, shall I just finish her or let her live fearing those uncertainty?
We've been dating for over a year. We promised each other at the time that if we broke up, we would be single for 5yrs. Unfortunately, we broke up. She had a new boyfriend a month after we broke up, and she did whatever she could to show me that she had gotten a better man than I am now. But she had no idea, however, that she had already broken a promise. I've been single for about 5 yrs, and the end of 2022 will officially be 5 years. Being single doesnt mean I cant get myself for a girlfriend. Because the promises we made to each other were genuine to me. After all, don't make promises if you can't keep them. :'3
I spend most of my morning thinking about you. My thoughts take me back to the moments when we first met. I remembered how those smiles of yours have captured my heart. I still recall the conversations we had, the laughs we shared, and every other thing that included you in there. Sometimes, I would daydream about you, and I get butterflies. I spend most of my evening wondering if we get to talk. I always wanted to talk to you but was too afraid to approach you. And whenever you texted me, my day just got better. I hope that our paths will cross one day because I want to see you again.
Consider this a respond to #KJ0061 β as a fellow person with ADHD (side note: ADHD more common than you might think). ADHD is often not talked about here (our country) and more often than not, this neurodivergent behavior is misjudged for laziness and reckless. There are many forms of ADHD, but in my specific case, I often hyper fixate on things and lose feelings really fast. I can start a new hobby and forget about it the next day. I can place my keys somewhere and would lose it just as quickly. In class, it is very difficult to concentrate and online class isnβt making it any easier. I often find myself fall short when it comes to tasks such as organizing and planning. I would forget to bring even the simplest thing. Iβm always running late for class, and falling behind on certain tasks. That doesnβt mean that I am unable to do anything just like the neurotypical (people with normal brain). It just take a lot more effort. Some of you will never understand how much effort it takes for a person with AHDH to bring everything to class, complete assignments on time and manage their time. Itβs not impossible, but it takes us so much effort just to seem normal. I try my best to walk at the same pace as the neurotypical, but Iβm sure many people with AHDH struggle more than me. If youβre reading this, be kind to people who you think might have ADHD. Maybe itβs not that they donβt try. Maybe itβs very, very, very hard for them to do the simplest things. Be understanding.
Being insecure is not a valid reason to leave the other person. Itβs too cruel, disrespect, disregard the love and the commitment the other person has for you and only you.
βAre u gonna miss me, when im gone?β YES, DEFINITELY. U tried to come back for many times, but I rejected u bβcuz of the all the guilt. I regret everything but I donβt want to go back. I really wish things to go back as before, but I donβt want u back. This may Sound like Iβm complicating my feelings, but one thing I know for sure is I still love u, I canβt move on but I donβt want to go back. Sometimes when I miss u, I want to reach out to u so bad but I donβt want u to see how miserable I am atm. U also knew that and always trying to reach out to me ask me if u need any help when Iβm on my own and I really appreciate that. One question I wanted to ask u rn, do u sympathize me or are u still here waiting for me as u promised me after we broke up?
I'm here to ask for some advise and also confess about what's going on in my mind. My current state is " I don't want to feel that kind of pain, but I want to feel that kind of love again". I'm a person who loves hard and won't be able to move on easily. We've been talking more than a year and there's no label in our relationship. It's just more than friend, yet less than lovers. I've been keep doing this and loving her so much throughout the year. But I guess my love is just not enough for her. She will never treat me good no matter what. She did something depend on her mood and that's hurting me. Come back whenever she wanted and leave as I was nothing. Sometimes I felt loved and another time felt nothing to her. But like I said I still want her so bad but don't want to feel the pain too. I don't know what to do. I miss her so bad. My heart still so soft and pure to her. I still think about her everyday. Please give me some ideas guys. Thank you so much for your time.
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