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I don't think you lied when you said " I love you " You meant it, but the love is not strong enough. Not strong enough to care about me; not strong enough to ever afraid of losing me; not strong enough to change for me; not strong enough to ask me to stay. And you let me go. I should have asked you when you said you love me. How much is the love...? 'cause now I'm suffering in the consequences of loving you too hard alone... I don't regret meeting you... But sometimes I wish I should have turned away the first time I met you... I wish I didn't choose to trust you. I wish I hadn't let myself fall for you. I wish.
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He was the one ex-bf that i feel wronged to break up with. But after that we're still seeing each other as a normal friend. It's look like he already moved-on and ready for a new start while i still stuck in the past, and keep thinking if there anyway that make us back together? Or should i keep silence and wait for him? Sometimes i really want to move on but i don't know how
I lost my friend several months ago. she was someone I talked to every day and even asked for advice. and we met when we’re studying in Australia. It still feels unreal every time I see her photos with a smiley face, I still have difficulty believing she’d do it. how can a girl who is always smiling dealing with mental illness and nobody knows about it. There were no warning signs. she is a person I wished I could be more like (not jealousy, I’m just admire her). Happy, creative, smart, perfect family status, beautiful smiles. Always upbeat and looking out for others. She texted me a day earlier before it happened. I should’ve talked to her that day a little more…why didn’t I. The way it happened was shocking. I still wonder if I could have helped her that day. It's almost like it never happened because it just doesn't seem real, it was so unexpected. As I'm typing this its just actually hitting me again that she is really gone. but looking back, yeah, there were some signs because I accidentally saw her searching about medicine but she said it was just research projects. the guilt in my guts is overwhelming. I also noticed that she was extremely exhausted and kinda isolated herself from anyone earlier that month but I was pretty naive on top of that. It really bothers me now, because she was obviously giving some signs but I was too stupid to realize what was going on. I LOVE YOU, S P.S If someone is popping up in your mind while reading this please don’t ignore them and checking on them every chance you get as the last chance you will ever have may have been yesterday. Be there when you can. Even if its just checking up on someone. If you care about someone, let them know. If someone reaches out to you, even a little... be there for them. You never know when they are in their final moment of desperation. Not everyone will have the same signs. Some won’t have any at all. If you suspect something at all... just let them know you care and that if they ever need to talk, that you are there for them. That they are never a burden, not to you. Even if they never open up to you, just hearing that can make a world of difference. And if you are struggling yourself, please open up to someone. Anyone. Even if its someone you don't know that well. There is nothing wrong if you’re going to met therapist.
Day by day, I started to know where I stand in everyone’s life. I’m that friend who is there when they need something. I’m that daughter who is responsible for every big and little things inside and outside the household. I’m that granddaughter who is just a female. I’m that sister who doesn’t deserve the respect. I’m that niece who got compared with the cousins’ parents and got hated by my own cousins. I’m that girlfriend who loves too much and also being a little too much that sometimes it suffocates him. Every eyes and words that look and say to me, make me feel small worthless. Whenever i try to explain what happen and both me, I got shouted back, not listening to me, first they comfort and still act the same. It’s hard coming home everyday and get the cold look from everyone and no one in the house actually talking to you. I have to repeat myself over 3 times to get the answer or someone attention. The only time I get someone to care enough for my well-being or existence is when I commit suicide.
One day, we were mentally and physically inseparable, and today, you are trying to avoid me. All the good days we spent together, I hope you still remember those days like I do. The days we shared our personal feelings and daily lives’ activities. I hope those days wouldn’t be forgotten in just a short period of time. If I were to be granted one wish, I wish those days happened once again. Even though what comes after hurt both of us and could potentially hurt people we are with, those days were the best days I could ever ask for.
I did the best I could but the result doesn’t satisfy me one bit. I want to give up but it means that all my effort have gone to waste, I also have no motivation to continue on. Everyone will just tell me to push through it but people have different tolerance. I don’t want to lose this but there’s also nothing ahead of me to look forward to
since we broke up, i have always missed her no matter whose im with. i used to be so happy that we broke up but i guess not anymore when i see her with someone new, we have been broken up for more than 2 years but i still can't forget her. Can somebody tell me what's wrong with me ?
Girl! You do experience and have a long lasting realtionship but how could you do this to me? Remember when there is stranger who try to talk to your man. You act up and blow it on social media about how disspoainted, sad, anger and how much you hate or dislike girl who behave like this. Then how should i react? When it is just a one time meeting but you try to stick around, try to fit in to the circle. I know it is just about friendliness, you have it toward me too. However, I got driven away and you got a place to stand. Not just a place you found one for your friend too. That is how I got repalced. I don’t know how to feel or react. How could I being treated like this? And You too girl! I do know love can’t be forced but I can’t make myself believe that you are not related in this. Even if it was just a one time gather but you sure know the history of me and that person. Then why do you still let one of your ally in? Standing in my place? I mean if there is no you or just don’t be too friendly or just stay in your circle maybe thing won’t turn out like this. I just feel so stupid or maybe I am one. That why even after you saw me, knew everything you still find a place for her because I am just something that is already thrown away anyway and that space is empty so it got to have a replacement? I mean don’t you understand what attachment is? Or am I a narrow minded who still dwell about the past? What if you were me can you stand and watch calmly without anxious, curiosity and wonder how could it happen if you are not between it? But I am happy for you. You don’t have to imagine yourself in this situation because you got a good person by your side! Still how could you take my good person for your alliance? I felt so insecure, regret of open up and afraid of getting to know new people. But maybe I shouldn’t feel like that anymore becuase now I got nothing else to lose.